Search
  • Dr. Lalit Chawla

E#48: We are Not in this Together: Hate, Division and Acceptance


This is a episode deals with the emotions of hate and disrespect.

I'm right, you're wrong!


(This is the core of the transcript from the podcast. The Intro has been removed and some areas improved for reading ease.)



I didn't really know what to share in this podcast, to be honest with you. I didn't want to do another episode around Covid-19. I wanted to focus on more positive things to lift our spirits up. That's why last week I released the interview I did with Hockey Legend Hayley Wickenheiser, who has such an even keel mindset and temperament. One thing she said, that stayed with me, is that nothing is really as great as it seems and nothing is really as bad as it seems in life.


Know this comes from someone who won 7 World Championships, 5 Olympic medals, 4 Gold and 1 Silver. She's won the Order of Canada and done so much. If anyone has bragging rights, she certainly does, yet she's one of the most humble people I know.


She always is looking to find the brighter side of things in life and is able to be calm in a storm. If you've listened to that interview, I'd love to hear what you walked away with.


So I've been thinking, now that we are about two months into the pandemic (if you live in North America) and all of our lives have changed. There are lots of emotions happening. Initially, I think there was so much fear and anxiety because of the uncertainty about what would happen locally in our own area and country. And that uncertainty still exists, but now the predominant mood appears to be that people are tired and restless.


There appears to be a lack of empathy or even hate in some people's social media posts or conversations.

There appears to be a lack of empathy or even hate in some people's social media posts or conversations. People seem to be more divided than ever before. One thing I know that is useful as a reminder for myself, because it's not always evident or clear, is that not everybody is experiencing this pandemic and the restrictions equally.


Some people find their home as a new haven for rest while others are finding it a prison.

Some are loving the time they have at home with themselves and their children as they are successfully homeschooling and learning new life skills.

Others are rising up, volunteering and helping people in the community.

Some families and couples are becoming stronger and united.


Conversely, others are still working and afraid of whether they will bring an infection home to their family. They are trying to figure out how to provide daycare and/or homeschool their children.

While others are at home worried about how they will pay their bills as they've just lost their job.

I also know some people are at home scared about their own safety and the safety of their children because of the abusive relationship they're in. We know domestic violence has gone up; for some children, school is their only safe haven.


People are also feeling very lonely as they are confined in their apartments or home.

Alarmingly, many people are afraid to seek much needed medical attention because they are scared of getting the coronavirus.


So while we are in this pandemic together, we are not all experiencing it the same way together.

So while we are in this pandemic together, we are not all experiencing it the same way together.

One thing that is appearing more and more evident is that people are becoming more divided on everyday issues or new government policies. Just look at the changes in gun restrictions happening in Canada, they debate is very hot in some circles.


People have different ideas about the pandemic - if it's real or a conspiracy - and we have people on both sides there. Hate seems to be prevailing more and more now.


So what is the solution?


I think we need to revisit a couple of principles, and the first one is that just because people don't agree about a particular viewpoint or idea, it does not mean, or should not mean that we hate each other. Hate is a very strong word that has a lot of intensity behind it. We need to relearn that we can disagree without being disagreeable. That's part of living in a more open society. The whole notion of respectful debate and the right to voice our opinion and not silence other voices by oppression is something we value in our country. I think we are losing that notion. Just because I disagree with your idea or viewpoint doesn't mean I hate you.


Just because I disagree with your idea or viewpoint doesn't mean I hate you.

Each person has a different background and life story. We are all shaped by our experiences and beliefs. Not all of us have the same ability, resources and awareness to respond in a situation.


I'm reminded of Maya Angelou's quote :

Do the best that you can until you know better.

Then when you know better, do better.


We've all made our own mistakes. We sometimes struggle to understand our own life story, let alone understand the actions and opinions of others. When I remember that, it helps me become more compassionate and understanding about others, their viewpoints and situations.


I Do the best that you can until you know better.
Then when you know better, do better.

So while we are in this together, we are not experiencing it the same way together because we all have different life stories and circumstances. If we remember these above two points, we can become more united and connected as we move along in this pandemic. May you and your family be healthy, happy and safe during this time.


I hope this served you. Please share this message with others, if you think it might serve them or others they know.

Stay Calm, find daily joys and live with intention.

I'm Dr. Lalit Chawla and thank you for listening.


And if you like more podcast episodes that might serve you, please go to TheIntrovertedDoctor.com. You can join the weekly email list, where I release the new episodes as a reminder. Have a great week!




I would love to hear any comments about this podcast and what would you like to hear in future episodes?





©  The Introverted Doctor.com